Wednesday, July 01, 2009

A somewhat serious post

I'm sure all 6 of my loyal readers have been noticing the severe lack of posts lately. I somewhat addressed it in my last post, but I guess I should come clean. I have been diagnosed with cancer.

I have debated back and forth whether I should mention it on my blog. Hell, I debated whether or not to keep it from my friends and family. However, the chemotherapy is kinda kicking my ass, so I figured I better tell people since they would notice I wasn't myself. Plus, if someone I cared about kept it secret from me, I'd be pretty pissed off about it.

However, on a blog, you can't see me or my actions, so I could have kept it a secret. What I don't want is for this to become a mopey, woe-is-me type of thing. Life can be shitty enough without another depressing blog out there. Plus, my chances for a full recovery are good, so this isn't going to get all morbid or anything like that.

So why come clean? Well, if you haven't noticed by now, a lot of my posts are me ranting about things that piss me off. And this definitely pisses me off. So I may decide to rant about it in the future. I really want to keep a sense of humor about all of this, so I may look at this from a different angle.

Plus, I am being forced to face issues that most of us don't like to think about. I'm sure this is leading to some of my reminiscing posts. Those posts are kind of fun to do anyways, so chances are good that I'll keep doing those.

And finally, my energy is absolutely shit these days. By the time I get home from work, I just want to sleep. This means I don't feel like posting, for all of you mensas out there.

So there it is. Don't feel sorry for me, because that will just piss me off. I like challenges, so this is how I'm approaching things. And because I'm me, we started a pool at work for what date I will shave my head when I start losing my hair. I don't know the dates anyone picked, and the only way we decided I could be eligible for the pool was for me to pick that I won't lose my hair at all. Nothing like gambling on your own body.

OK, enough of that crap. Your regularly scheduled immature posts will return shortly.


gynagirl said...

Man, that does suck. I know you don't want mushy stuff but I am truly sorry. On the bright side, you can now have an excuse for smoking pot... Oh, that might only work if you lived here in California... Oh, don't shave your head prematurely because sometimes your hair won't fall out. My aunties hair didn't fall out but did thin a little. Poor thing, we gave her a butch dyke hairdo in anticipation. Will you share if you start loosing hair does your pubes fall out too? Always wanted to know. Once again, I am deeply sorry.

Brian said...

Same here... no mushy stuff intended, but I'm sending all the good Karma I can muster in your direction.

Umbrella said...

Thanks guys. Funny, my best friend's first response was the pot thing as well, but I don't think that's legal here.

As for hair, I'm not too worried. I've shaved my head in the past, so it's no big deal. I'm pretty curious about the pubes too. I'll let you know.

And just for you gyna, I'll let you know that one of the great side effects from the chemo I'm noticing is that my crap smells absolutely horrible. I can't even find the words to describe it. Formaldahyde poop, maybe? Granted, I'm kinda sensitive to smells now, so maybe that's why it is grossing me out so much.

gynagirl said...

Thanks! I've never heard of poop stinking even worse on chemo, but it does make sense. I will now know what to expect if I meet others going through chemo...