Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Remember to always check your D cells

Work sucks, and is kicking my butt right now. I'm trying to make up for the unpaid days off. So I was working pretty late last night. I'm tired, I head out to my car, turn the key...

Dead silence.

Once again, I am the master of the self-jinx. Earlier in the day, I was discussing my daughter going away to college. We decided it would be best if she left her car with me while she is gone. I mentioned it would be good since I only have one car, and if anything happened to it, I would be screwed.

Same. Fucking. Day.

I was the only car left in the parking lot, so finding a jump was out of the question. I ended up hoofing it home. An hour and a half.

I wake up this morning bemoaning how out of shape I am. I wasn't about to do that walk again. So I went back to my roots (i.e. poor) and got on the bus. And that's when I remembered that being poor sucks. I used to ride the bus when I was a kid. You get to meet some really cool people. By cool, I mean freaky, and by people, I mean mongoloids.

The guy who decided to carry on a discussion with me this morning was one of these. He was wearing a shirt that was a spoof of the Survivor logo, but it said Redneck instead. Outhunt, outdrink, outburp indeed. It's not like I couldn't tell from your dental work. He had only one front tooth, which was several shades whiter than the rest of his teeth, and stuck out at about a 45 degree angle. I am not making this up.

You may think I'm being some sort of elitist with this talk. Well, for your information, I was born in the Ozarks. I've got enough hillbilly blood in me to be my own cousin. However, I got away from all of that.

To complete my white trash morning, I went to Wal Mart to get some baking soda to clean my terminals before I put the new battery in. Any day I end up in Wal Mart is a bad day indeed. There's a reason Wal Mart bingo was invented.


I found 12 of these in about 5 minutes.


I was worried that my comments and email would be filled with angry rednecks over this, but then I remembered that they don't know how to use computers, so everything's good.

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